Regret and Grief (original)

http://www.cdbaby.com/mystimayhem
http://www.mystimayhem.com
http://www.stereofame.com/mysti_mayhem

im learning that some of my best ideas have been my worst decisions
in a puddle of sweat i counted the tiles there are 141
its 4am i should be sleeping but mistakes wont let me rest
bouncing themes back and forth about my life and I regret a regrettable past

and it keeps me awake despite my good deeds
that i try to do to buy myself a little karmatic relief
here i am stuck in the middle of regret and grief
how could anyone love me

i lived from city to city so many times that i gave up on making friends
cuz as soon as i remember how to live and how to love I wind up leaving

when theres no family or friends to fall back on
and no god to seek my attention
and I cant trust myself cuz I'm worst enemy